Monday, November 27, 2006

powers that be

A pressing need of a human being with my type of DNA setup will be to earn money and ample of it to fund monthly trips to the Bahamas (Goa is passé). It is an innocuous wish, and still the heavens above refuse to oblige and I dont see any good reason in sight for them to do so. Infact the trip will help everyone immensely. I will be purchasing things in Bahamas which will help them raise their GDP. I will be taking money out of india leaving less chance of corruption amongst those wily bastards here, and most importantly ladies there will get to see me. So it's a win-win situation for all.

But then again such wishes are never fulfilled. I wonder why.

The politicians seem to be doing something right. And only they seem to know what it is.
Maybe its producing 11 children, or blatant lying in front of cameras or throwing tantrums that might put a child in a crib to shame, which releases the secret powers that be, and shine on these bastards and how.

I have begun searching for these powers myself. Yoga hasn't helped me so far, as chanting "today is a great day" has done nothing but spoilt my day, (a certain accounting lec notwithstanding). Breathing In and Breathing Out just aggravated my sinus cavity. Stretching my limbs has made me more prone to cramps then ever before and Yoga doesn't have any cure for Hangover!!!

Psychiatric Sessions called GROWEL, suggested carrying stones in my pocket and christening them, "gratitude" would attract these seemingly ubiquitous powers to me. They did attract the powers that be in Mumbai, the Riot Police, who thought i was on my way to some mischief and my long hair didn't help me convince my innocence (now now....it sure is a possibilty).

Somebody suggested reading was a great way to find the way to make the the universe smile on you, and I almost fell for it. Paulo Coelho's "Alchemist" made me realise that, that certain person was lying.

I gave up, and but then someone suggested Beer.....and did it work and how!!!
Post the 4th bottle of Beer (the big one, no pints here and these figures might vary from person to person), one will notice that everyone around has a smile on their faces and becomes extra courteous. They ask you for some more beer, and you invariably say ay'ay.... and then there are some more smiles.......and then some more. And these smiles are a precursor to some goodluck in the future albeit the bill might make you think otherwise.

Cheer(s)ful disposition, aint it!!!

p s: Thesaurus defines 'grovel' as ," to lie or crawl with the face downward and the body prostrate, esp. in abject humility, fear, etc."